BAD CGI SHARKS

It started with the moon. Scientists said it shifted a few degrees off its orbit — not enough to panic, just enough to confuse the tides. Then came the fish rains. Then the fins. First, a surfing competition in the Sahara. Then a rogue shark attack at a landlocked wedding venue. Then twenty minutes of static-filled livestream from the ISS before it, too, was bitten in half. Everyone thought it was viral marketing. It wasn’t. The sharks are here — poorly rendered, barely textured, and impossibly lethal. You were supposed to be a background extra, a marine researcher, a day player in a minor scene. But now the cameras won’t stop rolling, the budget’s gone off the rails, and something wearing a shark’s shape is looking right at you. You have nine turns (90 minutes of narrative time) to scavenge, improvise, survive, and collect enough Plot Points to face the Final Shark. Or die trying — probably to an ironic synthwave soundtrack. A solo survival RPG where you get to live a bad shark movie! one six sided and one twenty sidied die are required. Bad CGI Sharks is dedicated to the memory of my friend, Maddie Deering., who passed away earlier this year. Maddie was absolutely passionate about Independent Horror movies and community. She was the director of Spirit Animal and Bathtub Shark Attack. She also had an enormous love of shark flicks.